We are currently baby proofing our house because of our 8 months who thinks he could break the Guinness book of record by climbing the stairs so many times in a day.
After we’ve fixed the safety gates on the stairs, he went towards the stairs to climb it as usual. However this time, there is a barrier. Seeing that he couldn’t go up as he used to, he held on to the gates and was trying to force it open by shaking it really hard. I watched as he was applying all the force and pressure he could to break that gate as he murmured in his ‘baby language’. With smile on my face, I thought if only he understood the danger of leaving this gate opened, he would appreciate the reason why it should stay closed for now.
Immediately I realised that I do act like my little boy. I bang, force, pull and try to pray open gates that God has kept closed for my safety. The frustration of knocking on that gate continuously makes me start complaining and murmuring. Like my little boy, I can’t understand why that gate is closed. But the One who closed it knows better. He knows that I am not strong enough to go on that route at the moment. He knows that I don’t have the discipline to climb ‘those stairs’ without falling. He knows that at the moment, there are too many distractions that will prevent me from focusing on that path. He understands that climbing those ‘stairs’ requires a level of maturity which I don’t have.
So He has closed it for my good. Most times, it’s a temporary gate just like my safety gate won’t be there forever. A time will come when my baby will be old enough to go on those stairs unaided and then I will take the gate off. In the meantime, I am focusing on teaching him how to be comfortable and also exposing him to situations that will prepare him for taking the grown up stairs.
This is what God does too. Looking back I can see how He closed certain doors temporarily as He exposed me to things that will make me strong enough before He opened the gates and took away the barriers.
Just as my baby could see the stairs but couldn’t access it, I understand that the fact that I can see the blessings doesn’t mean I should access it now. Sometimes God gives us a glimpse of the blessing but He doesn’t allow us the full access to them because we don’t have what it takes to handle the blessings. Instead of me to start doing things that will prepare me to be able to get and use the blessings for His glory when the gate is opened, I waste all my time by staying by the closed gate complaining as I gaze at the blessings ahead of me. Thereafter I blame God for the delays and blame the devil also for the obstacles he put my way. You see, I really aren’t different from the Israelites who spent longer years in the wilderness than they were supposed to because of their attitude.
So today I just want to first and foremost tell God I am sorry for wasting my time murmuring and for blaming Him for my delays. I thank Him for those closed gates because they made me stronger, wiser, patient and more disciplined. I thank Him for His wisdom and knowledge that keeps me from crashing. I thank Him for not giving in to my tantrums. I thank Him for being stern with me. I thank Him for not answering all my prayers because He knows best.
In all I have come to the conclusion that the best prayer to pray is “God let your will be done”.